Posts tagged dealing with loss
Bowls of Sand and Milk

I’m so blitzed I’m nearly seeing double. I’m watching the ceiling, how the beams of wood move up and down like tetris, sliding themselves neatly into place.

I had to call the vet to come and kill my dog today. On the roof there are people doing blow and watching sunsets look at how fucking bright and red and pink that is holy shit it’s fucking beautiful, man.

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I’m twenty-five. Catastrophe leveled my world; dogmatic principles have been vaporized. The future reduced to cinders, all in a moment. I imagine I’m beyond the last horizon where broken dreams and ruined love go to die. I can’t concentrate or sit still or eat. There is only coffee, cigarettes and pacing then coffee cigarettes and pacing. I’m alone haunting a four bedroom house on a tree-lined suburban street for an eternity. There are ghosts on every street corner. Nights are the worst. Maybe I’m still there.

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